Politeness ,The Mechanics of Virtue, aphorism 282

282

Politeness yields to courage when courage is misunderstood.  But courage yields to politeness when politeness is understood.

It is only due to our inherited serfdom that politeness is seen as “submissive behavior.” And it is easy to twist this condition into a shoddy formula for “freedom”:

That which is submissive is polite.
That which is not submissive is not polite.

Freedom is not submissive. 
Therefore, freedom is not polite.

And therefore, I prove my freedom with my inappropriate behavior.

What interests us here is that one is still reacting to the dominant.  Only someone whose freedom is in doubt feels the need to prove his freedom.  But no one needs to prove the obvious.  Both submission and insubordination presuppose one's lower status.  One baits oneself with the dare, If I really were free of the master, then I would be able to thumb my nose at him.  But testing ability and managing ability are not the same predicament.

The goal, then, is not to be impolite out of a fear of submission, but to re-engineer a self-sufficient frame of mind where that which depends upon polite behavior is dignity.  That is, the template for forming our question has already been provided by our condition ... by the fact that we descended from a long line of servants.  Consequently, any choice between options will remain within the servant's frame of mind.  The upshot is that we must reject the two options presented by our inherited question in order to see that we also have a choice between questions. 

Is my value dependent upon this or that gesture? ... any fighting over which presumes the master's higher value?  Or, am I finally free of any concern for the master whatsoever ... finally self-sufficient? We would prefer even to manifest our indifference through a feigned subordination than become subordinate by resisting.  If in maintaining my dignity any “insubordination” is perceived, then it is incidental to my indifference: any offense would only be a consequence of the other's fear of inferiority.

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